Hello!

You may have heard recently about the mother in Georgia who was arrested and handcuffed in front of her kids after her nearly 11-year-old son walked unsupervised to a store that was just under a mile from their home.

Does free-range parenting risk arrest? I get concerned about stories like this because it can make us fearful to encourage greater independence in our kids.

I decided to research the details of the case.

It turns out that this story was not about free-range parenting

Based on several news articles about the Georgia mother, it appears that she left her son at home when she had to take her other child to a doctor’s visit. She had not given him permission to walk to the store.

Interestingly, the mother in Georgia might have been arrested primarily because of an apparent attitude of unconcern when the cops called her about her son. From the details I found, this instance does not truly exemplify a free-range parenting approach.

Free-range parenting involves giving our kids increasing freedom to do things independently as they prove they are responsible and will contact us when they need help. It is not the same as laissez-faire (“anything goes”) parenting. Rather, free-range parenting is:

• Intentional

• Proactive

• Cooperative

• Rule-bound

There are many ways for us to safely and intentionally encourage our kids to become more independent in their activities and play while staying off the radar of police and child protective services (CPS).

1. Know the laws in your state and community (look up your state’s laws at letgrow.org; you might be surprised at how lax or restrictive they are)

2. Set expectations (the activities and location where your kids will be)

3. Make sure your kids can reach you immediately (not just run home, but call you on a cell phone or a two-way radio)

4. Prepare to deal in an informed and nonconfrontational way with “good Samaritans” (people who think your kids need a supervising adult immediately present might approach your kids and question them or call the police)

5. Teach your kids how to respond when questioned (some kids have a “Free-Range Kids Card” that they keep in their pocket that explains that they are not lost or neglected and includes a parent’s name and phone number)

We can help our kids to become more independent in their play and activities. And we don’t need to be scared off by extreme stories or rare events. In what ways would you like to encourage your child to grow in independence today?

Warmest regards,

Len

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